For peeps new to this blog, FYI, this is a blog made for a special person named Woo Kwong Yang, who passed away 12th of November 2004 due to respiratory problems.

Well, I've changed the skin of this blog (I've in fact changed all three skins of my blogs) and here we are.

Somehow I feel that this is more appropriate.

To tell you the truth, I've dreamt of him. Four times.

The first time I dreamt of him I woke up crying. He looked so far away and everytime I went closer, it turned out to be someone else. It happened a few times in a row. He looked at me in a melancholic way as if he had something to say but couldn't.

The second and third time occurred with his bike (or my bike, so to speak). And the forth, we had dinner at grandma's.

I keep thinking of him at night before I sleep. Wishing that everything was a horrible nightmare, and forcing myself once again to relieve the events following his passing. Why?

This blog isn't made for his friends tho'. I selfishly made this blog so that I would never forget him. So that I would remember him, remember this pain because it feels so real. This isn't a dream.

A few times when I was walking alone outside, I saw visions of him. I couldn't believe my eyes. But when I ran forwards to hug him, the vision vanished. I ended up hugging myself and kneeling on the floor crying.

Why?! Why wasn't I the one to go instead of him? Why?!